Spiritual
​"But store up treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor decay destroys, nor thieves break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be." - Matthew 6:21-22
We pray this information brings you hope, peace and comfort.
We also encourage you to speak with a trusted priest for additional guidance and to answer any questions you may have.
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Catholic Church Teaching
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Life begins at conception, therefore it is right to grieve for the loss of your child.
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The Catechism states:
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“Every human life, from the moment of conception until death, is sacred because the human person has been willed for its own sake in the image and likeness of the living and holy God.” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, no. 2319)
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The Catechism of the Catholic Church no. 1261 states:
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“As regards children who have died without Baptism, the Church can only entrust them to the mercy of God, as she does in her funeral rites for them. Indeed, the great mercy of God who desires that all men should be saved, and Jesus’ tenderness toward children which caused him to say: ‘Let the children cometo me, do not hinder them,’ allow us to hope that there is a way of salvation for children who have died without Baptism.”
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“The Hope of Salvation for Infants who Die without Being Baptised,” a study requested by Pope Saint Paul II and published during the papacy of Pope Benedict XVI in 2007.
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See this link for the full text: https://www.vatican.va/roman_curia/congregations/cfaith/cti_documents/rc_con_cfaith_doc_20070419_un-baptised-infants_en.html.)
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In the book Grieving Together - A Couple’s Journey through Miscarriage the authors write:
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“The Church upholds the importance of baptism for salvation but also teaches that baptism is a sacrament for the living, and that God’s saving power is not limited by the sacraments: “Baptism is necessary for salvation for those to whom the Gospel has been proclaimed and who have had the possibility of asking for the sacrament...God has bound salvation to the sacrament of Baptism, but he himself is not bound by his sacraments” (CCC 1257). In citing this teaching from the catechism, the 2007 Vatican document explains that “God can therefore give the grace of Baptism without the sacrament being conferred, and this fact should particularly be recalled when the conferring of Baptism would be impossible. The need for the sacrament is not absolute.”
St. Bernard of Clairvaux wrote to a couple that had a miscarriage.
In response to their question, “What is going to happen to my child? The child didn’t get baptized,” St. Bernard said,
“Your faith spoke for this child. Baptism for this child was only delayed by time. Your faith suffices. The waters of your
womb — were they not the waters of life for this child? Look at your tears. Are they not like the waters of baptism? Do not fear this. God’s ability to love is greater than our fears. Surrender everything to God.”
Prayers/Blessings
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Blessing of Parents after Miscarriage or Stillbirth
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Ask a priest or deacon for this blessing which can be found in their book of blessings
(or click on the blessing above)
Miscarriage Prayer by Mother Angelica:
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My Lord, the baby is dead!
Why, my Lord— dare I ask why? It will not hear the whisper of the wind or see the beauty of its
parents’ face— it will not see the beauty of Your creation or the flame of a sunrise. Why, my Lord?
“Why, My child— do you ask ‘why’? Well, I will tell you why.
You see, the child lives. Instead of the wind he hears the sound of angels singing
before My throne. Instead of the beauty that passes he sees everlasting Beauty— he sees My face. He was created and lived a short time so the image of his parents imprinted on his face may stand before Me as their personal intercessor. He knows secrets of heaven unknown to men on earth. He laughs with a special joy that only the innocent possess. My ways are not the ways of man. I create for My Kingdom and each creature fills a place in that Kingdom that could not be filled by another. He was created for My joy and his parents’ merits. He has never seen pain or sin. He has never felt hunger or pain. I breathed a soul into a seed, made it grow and called it forth. ”
I am humbled before you, my Lord, for questioning Your
wisdom, goodness, and love. I speak as a fool— forgive me. I acknowledge Your sovereign rights over life and death. I thank You for the life that began for so short a time to enjoy so long an Eternity.
"Everything God Ordains is Always Good"- St Basil the Great
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Click here to read a letter written by St Basil of Caesarea (4th century) to Nectarius who's infant child had just "fallen asleep".
Saints
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Gianna Beretta Molla
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Gerard Majella
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Zelie Martin (and the entire Martin family)
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Catherine of Siena
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Catherine of Sweden